Cult Cravings: Microwave Massacre

1983, 76 Minutes
USA

Director: Wayne Berwick

Cast: Jackie Vernon, the original Frosty the Snowman

Be sure not to miss this 2K restoration (from the original camera negative) of the so-called “worst horror film of all time!”

An insane and gore-filled comedy/horror extravaganza, Microwave Massacre is a real ‘80s relic dressed up like a ‘70s porno. The film’s curmudgeonly killer: Jackie Vernon, a real-life raunchy stand-up best known as the original cartoon voice of Frosty the Snowman. Vernon, playing a dimwit construction worker everyman, just wants to eat a bologna sandwich for lunch with the guys, but is forced to consume an array of grotesque gourmet experiments engineered by his shrill wife equipped with a ridiculously oversized new microwave. A bout of drunkenness and the sight of one of the wife’s repulsive meals is all it takes to push Donald to commit the titular act, thus beginning this slapstick gorefest.

 

“Listen, you can think whatever you want, but Frosty the Snowman shoving his wife into a giant microwave is 100% my aesthetic.” — Tony the Terror?, Letterboxd

“An inept joke of a movie” — David Nusair, Reel Film Reviews